30 Minutes in a Coffin

I'm really hoping that the hardware they're putting in my spine this summer means NO MORE MRI's. Like always, during today's I had to fight off the panic that comes from being in a tiny tube. My hands were on my stomach and my elbows pressed against the sides. I asked for a washcloth to cover my eyes so I didn't open them and see HOW close it was to my face because I know that would have set me off. When I realized how fast I was breathing I started counting my breaths to slow me down. I got to about 500 and I know I missed several. I've seen the difference between the detail of an MRI vs a CT so I get why they are preferred but they scare the crap out of me. On top of the being in a box feeling I've watched way too many doctor shows and I get paranoid that I forgot a piece of metal on me somewhere and am about to have it ripped out. If they ever do make me have an MRI post-surgery (supposedly the plates and screws are deep enough to not be a problem) I'm demanding some drugs. Not sure I can fight off the coffin-panic AND the oh-my-god-my-spine-is-going-be-ripped-out panic.